In 2013 I was telling myself that I wanted a friend, who was about the same age as me and who was a Christian like me. I was asking God and telling Him that I needed a Christian friend, someone that I talk to and rely on, for help and for support. Looking back at it now. It was kind of like me asking God for a human god because I was desperately wanting a friend that I can look up to, lean on, speak to, share my problems with… I wanted a human god, which now I know was wrong.
Months later, and to my surprise, God gave me what I wanted and like a lot of the times, God gave me more than what I asked for. Not only did He give me a Christian friend but He also gave me a life group! So not only did I have a Christian friend but I also had a whole group of people who were Christians that I can go to for help or prayer. I was glad that God has heard and answered my request. I was especially glad that God had placed Joy into my life. Joy was one of the leaders and she was also the one who would drive me to church, to life group and once in a while to other places. There I was, happy, thankful, calm, when suddenly my boat was turned over by the strong wind. Suddenly, I found out that Joy was leaving. She was leaving our life group. What? Why? I thought God answered my prayer? Didn’t God just put Joy into my life? Why was He taking her away from me now? Why is she leaving? Why is God allowing this to happen? Questions ran through my mind. I didn’t know what God was doing and why He was doing this to me. When Joy left I was really sad. I missed her for months! Well, not that I don’t miss her now but it took me many months to get over/used to it. I even remember crying sometimes. The next year, which was 2015, Sarah took over (not that Sarah wasn’t already in this group) and once again I was happy and thankful for a friend like Sarah. God had placed Sarah in my life for two whole years, a person who was/is kind and she was/is the true friend type. Sarah is also a caring and a helpful person. After being in the same life group with her for two years, on the second year when I found out that she was leaving, I was even more confused. First, Joy left, now Sarah too?? What was going on? I was lost for words. One moment God was answering my prayer and another moment He was taking everything away from me? Why??
In 2016 when I was in the middle of my sadness and confusion God answered me. He showed me the reason why He removed Joy and Sarah from the life group. He wanted me to have a personal relationship with Him, an intimate and personal relationship. He wanted me to learn to lean on Him and He wanted me to know how to turn to Him for help and support. All along God’s ultimate goal was for me to look to Him. Now I finally understand why He removed Joy and Sarah. I know now that they were gone for good.